The Magic of Amia,
So I have been looking over the forums repeatedly and I see much attacking of other people, bullying, flaming and just plain old fighting that it is too much for me to take. Now, I could spend a crap ton of my time just ranting up the walls about people and everything I dislike that is happening on Amia or even in real life. But, I thought long and hard on this and it does no good, does it make you all feel good? Does making others feel so bad about themselves do anything in real life? Does it make you feel good when someone bashes down on you? I know for one I don't like it. All my life I have dealt with mass abuse, to an extreme that I could likely be called a basket case. Currently I am living in a hell dealing with my past families affairs and yet do you all see me bringing it to the table when I play?
No, and I think there is a lesson in that. We are a small community of a select and unique set of individuals who pride ourselves in our vast imaginations. We are a rare breed of special people, who share a special interest in a game that has gone well past its date. Why? because of our memories tied to it. Like life, Amia and Neverwinter Nights is a part of each of us. It is a part of our past, a part of our very soul and despite how much we stress at times we all love it. But why do we love it? We love it because this is who we are, we are seen. We are a united group that are not ghosts to those around us. So, I am making this thread for that exact reason. I want us to remember the good from NwN and Amia. Seriously, fuck the bad. We got enough bad shit in our own lives, we all do. So why carry it on. Fuck it, lets make it fun. Let us laugh together, let us cry together, let us share our pain, our loss and then smile about it knowing we are not alone.
That is right, your all not alone. I for one have a lot to say about Amia. I have left and I have come back, I have tried many ways to fit in. I have lead groups and been support in the background. It is fun to me, even in my hardest times I still look at the good. Want to know why? The reason is simple, because dwelling on the shit only serves to pile it up. No one likes to tromp around in turdy dumps. So we should all post about some of the good, remember our roots and toss out old grudges. Were a community and it is kind of silly to be pissy over something so small, so let me start.
I am thankful to Neverwinter Nights and Amia because to start they let me be myself. Online I could express myself, I could fly and be myself. It was because of this I had the confidence in myself to not kill myself in real life due to the bad I dealt with. It gave me my wife, she saw me as a person she could love. We met on another server, she was a DM and I was the former Admin (Oh god, those days were horrid lol). But we grew close, we laughed and we cried. We dealt with a lot of hate from other people, yet we bonded and it was thanks to role playing that let us bond. When that server went down we came to Amia together. We had a rough start here at first, but then found our place among others. We came to love the classes, the unique abilities and got drawn into the magic of its world.
It was Amia that created Izariel for me. The character I based off what I desired to be so much in real life. I wanted to be stronger (because inside I am not confident and frail.), I wanted to be a hero (because to my family I was the villain that ruined their lives from being born.), I wanted to lead people (because I lack the confidence in myself to step up, to fight.). His confidence gave me confidence, his purity was the opposite of how I felt in real life. The light I strive so hard to grasp has always been out of my reach, but through him a creation my wife and I did together I reached it. He was a character with the sole purpose to inspire and my lord the role play that came with it was legendary. For better or worse, he had his own story and lived.
It was Amia that let my wife and I have so many good conversations, it let me work out so many problems I had simply by playing. Why? because people cared, I am seen in a community. That feeling of being a ghost is not there, we are seen and it is kind of nice. We inspired and worked together to come up with idea after idea to inspire role play in our characters and with many of you. Four notebooks later, I still have so many silly written things down and yet my imagination could fly and so could hers. Together we had a little pair of wings, and all of you have that same set.
We were playing Amia when my wife wound up pregnant. Our daughter, a surprise baby that came into our lives and we held in our arms as we played with many of you. A creation of two people, who have chosen a path together formed into one little midget with two colored eyes like her daddy. It made me proud to be a father, it made and still does make me so. Knowing I can log on and chat in tells with friends who actually are interested in knowing how my wife and family are generally doing. How often does that happen for free in real life to all of us? Not very often. Yet here we all stand together, so personal that we likely know more about our "rivals" in the game then we know about our own blood in real life. Impressive isn't it, when you really think about it.
Amia forces me to be crafty, to think outside the box. This I love, it challenges me. I think on lore, I work to study. My wife pulls out source books, she laughs and smiles because of it. Seeing that helps me move forward, seeing her smile and hearing about others smile for the same reason helps me take another step in life. We all have this, even among our fights and bickering we still found worthy enough rivals to actually go after. Yet again, we are seen, we are heard and we got something to stand for. This is impressive and not easy to find outside of Amia or Neverwinter Nights. I life feeling like I matter a bit more, I am sure all of you feel the same.
The adventures, I have so many good memories of adventures. Even the bad ones, still make me chuckle. Like come on, who gets to sit there and day dream after a event in Amia that has you thinking something like "Oh man, when I beat that demon up I felt epic." That is right people, we are epic. As a hobby we fight demons, we use magic, we crunch numbers, we slash out stories, we are the hero's of our stories and we create a world like JR. Tolken did all ourselves and even together. Why hate on others that do the same? How can we, that is just cool shit. Makes me feel pretty damn bad ass, even though I am in my thirties now. I still feel bad ass when I smash up some zombies, or take down a hard boss.
These are only a few examples of how I would consider Amia magic. How about you all? Can you put aside the anger, the stress and play the game? Can you think of your fondest memories and it gives you a smile and a laugh? Can you think back on the fun had and not help but chuckle and reflect? Can you really stay mad even after it all? If so then Amia is not the same place for you as it is others. Perhaps it is time to move on. But, if you can then that is what we need to remember and work to create more of. I welcome any and all to post fun memories on here, reflect on the past and just be honest. Have fun with it, remember we are a community of rare and unique individuals. We don't all have to be friends, but I do confess it is fun having friends that are friends and not fake. So there was my little contribution, because I believe if we can look at Amia in this light things will honestly change. We are all here for a reason, pretty sure it is to have fun and play a game. After all, we are role players and writers. So lets get them stories going and pull together, prove the fucking world wrong that we can have our own place and fly with our imaginations. Take care all, have fun.
~Sky~
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