A Brief Guide to the Traditional Dwarven Wedding Ceremony by Vigdis of Runedar
Introduction This is a brief guide detailing what are considered to be traditional Dwarven wedding practices. While the contents of this guide are far from the only way to conduct a wedding among kin, it attempts to detail, in the greatest accuracy and clarity possible, features common to most Dwarven weddings.
The Guests Guests of the wedding are traditionally divided into two groups, each with their own particular roles, duties, and significance:
- Guests of the Hold: Members of the citadel are considered to be invited, as are any visiting kin. Their traditional duty is threefold: To bear witness to the vows, to pray for the success of the newlyweds, and to protect the couple during the ceremony and celebration.
- Guests of the Families: The bride and groom, as well as their families, may both invite outsiders to the ceremony. Custom dictates that the leaders of each partner's clan (or absent such, the leader of the Hold) may strike names from these guest lists if they are found to be objectionable. These guests are responsible for counselling the couple if needed to help them keep their vows.
A word on certain groups: Elves: Many find it advisable to invite the leaders of nearby elven settlements if good relations are sought. Failure to invite at least a few elves to a social event is often viewed as a significant slight. Be certain to afford them seating near enough to the altar that they are likewise not insulted.
Humans: Give them the cheap ale. Most won't know the difference.
Hin: Keep an eye on the valuables.
The Ceremonial Implements - The Hammer: A ceremonial smithing hammer is produced for the wedding, usually of gold or platinum. The head and the haft are kept separate until they are joined by the couple during the ceremony.
- The Steins: The bride and groom each bring a fine stein to the ceremony. The Hold also produces a stein for use in the ceremony, as detailed below.
The Ceremonial Garb - The Groom: Traditionally, the groom is arrayed in gleaming golden armour. This tradition dates back to our earliest kings seeking to honor the marriage of Moradin to Berronar Truesilver. If the couple cannot afford to commission such a piece, it is not considered shameful to borrow one from another kin (though it may be ill-fitting).
- The Bride: The bride is adorned in a gown of silver or mithral maille reminiscent of the garb of Berronar. If the couple can only afford to commission one of the two spouses' ceremonial armours, the bride's maille is traditionally commissioned.
- The Honor Guard: The honor guard's apparel is traditionally arranged by the spouse whom the guard protects during the ceremony. Most choose to adorn them in armours similar to the bride and groom, though not as resplendent.
- The Guests: Guests are expected to dress formally.
The Wedding Party The members of the traditional wedding party and their places are as follows:
- The Officiant: Traditionally a Faenor performs the duties of officiant, but in a pinch the local kin with highest authority may conduct the ceremony. The officiant stands in front of the altar during the ceremony and is responsible for guiding the ceremony, administering the vows and oaths, and witnessing the joining on behalf of the Morndinsamman.
- The Bride and Groom: The betrothed couple stand before the officiant during the ceremony. They are responsible for the swearing of oaths and vows and presentment of gifts to the Hold.
- The Honor Guard: The bride and groom each name one or more close friends (usually of the same sex) to act as their Honor Guard. These individuals stand to the sides of the couple, protect them during the ceremony and bear witness to their vows.
- The Bearers: Often children or close friends, the bearers are responsible for bringing various ceremonial implements to the altar during the ceremony, though do not stand with the wedding party itself.
The Ceremony The ceremony traditionally begins with the presentment of the bride and groom to the officiant for what is traditionally known as the Inspection.
- The Inspection: The officiant stands facing the crowd and asks for a list of the couple's deeds in service of Dwarfkind. The leader of the Hold or a deputy will then stand and state the couple's deeds before the officiant, who witnesses the recitation on behalf of the Morndinsamman. Once this is complete, the officiant asks if there are any misdeeds against Dwarfkind that are known; this is much akin to the human tradition of asking if anyone objects to the union, and any in the crowd who know of any misdeeds that may have harmed the Dwarven people are encouraged to speak them to the officiant. If no objections are raised, the Inspection is complete.
- The Presentation: Once the Inspection is complete, the officiant ceremonially presents the couple to the Morndinsamman to be joined. At this point the bearers bring the parts of the smithing hammer forward, presenting them to the couple. The officiant then administers the Oaths Before the Gods and Kin.
- The Oaths: The couple traditionally makes the following oaths, as prompted by the officiant: 1. To serve Dwarfkind in this life and beyond. 2. To serve their Hold until the end of their days. 3. To work dutifully and be not a burden to their kin until death take them. 4. To keep the faith of the Morndinsamman and strive always to live in its light.
- The Joining: The officiant blesses the parts of the hammer in the name of the Morndinsamman. The couple then ceremonially join the hammer, symbolizing their future of unified contribution to the betterment of our kin. Once the hammer is joined, the bearers bring forth the steins brought by the bride and groom. The bride and groom in turn present their steins to the officiant as a symbol of forswearing their own interests and pleasure for the sake of their partner. The steins are either melted down or smashed (depending on local custom), though may simply be taken away. The officiant will then present the couple with the stein gifted by the Hold. This is symbolic in that whatever one spouse fills their life with, so will they both drink of it.
- The Vows: The partners traditionally exchange vows to each other at this point. These may be those passed down within the family or written by the partners themselves; what is important is the public declarations each partner wishes to make to the other. It is highly advised that the couple prepare these beforehand, as doing so on the spot more often than not leads to embarrassing results. Once the vows are complete, the couple exchanges tokens of their vows; these often take the forms of rings, bracelets, or in rare cases shields. Whatever the item of choice, the partners keep their tokens with them for life.
- The Toasts: Once the vows are complete, the officiant fills the couple's stein. Usually it is filled from a ceremonial silver keg, though this tradition is observed sporadically and usually reserved for royalty. The officiant directs the couple to share their first drink as husband and wife, at which point they are considered wed and celebrations may begin.
- The Walk of Dedication: After they are joined, the bride and groom traditionally visit the idols of the Morndinsamman in their hold. By custom this walk is taken without the company of others, though it is not unheard of for at least some of the wedding party to accompany them. The couple may make dedications and offerings to the gods at this time, further sealing their bond before the gods. Meanwhile, the wedding feast and celebration are prepared for their return.
The Celebration Once the newlyweds arrive at the celebration, it is custom that they each begin by presenting their gifts to the Hold and to the guests. Each spouse makes a gift to the Hold first, usually something within their trade. An armourer may present a fine new set of smithing tools, and a hunter a number of furs and hides, for example. The leader of the Hold accepts these gifts and gives the couple their blessing. Finally, the couple turns to the crowd and commands the feast to be brought forth as their gift to the guests.
Traditions There are a number of traditions carried down by various holds and families that, while not universally observed, are considered to be good luck upon the couple. These are not mandatory, but are included for those who wish to incorporate such traditions into their ceremonies.
- Presentment of the Tooth: The groom may choose to present his wife with a giant's tooth either during the ceremony or on the Walk of Dedication. This tradition comes to us from Earthfast. Retrieval of the tooth is believed to show dedication on behalf of the groom, with rarer and harder-to-acquire varieties of teeth being more prestigious gifts.
- The Cauldron Dance: During the festivities in High Haspur, guests are invited to dance around a large empty cauldron and throw coins in for the benefit of the couple. This often proves quite the boon to the young newlyweds if their friends are the type to try to outdo each other. Some scholars debate on whether this is borrowed from the Gnomish coin-and-bucket dance or vice versa.
- Buying the Bride: Several families traditionally allow guests to pay the groom for a dance with the bride during the festivities. While similar in purpose to the Cauldron Dance, many noble dwarves see this as a crass practice.
- The Boot Drink: Citadel Felbarr has a unique tradition wherein the bride and groom each drink water from a workboot of the other spouse. Felbarr's dwarves hold that if the couple can put up with that particular ordeal, then there is nothing in married life that they can't stomach for the other's sake.
- Serving in Twos: Though once a rare tradition, in recent times it has become a widespread custom to serve the bride two of everything at the feast. This is considered good luck and ensures the bearing of healthy twins.
- Pin The Ears On The Elf: More commonly a childhood game, this is played with a painted wooden board and a cut-out piece of wood in the shape of an elf ear with a nail in it. Not suggested for mixed company. Popular among the Mithral Hall mining families.
- Alecoins: Another popular game, several pints are set up in front of each of two competitors, who then try and toss a coin into one of the other's mugs. If a coin lands in a mug, the contestant the mug is in front of must drink it. Some varieties allow the coin to be bounced off the table to make the opponent drink two ales.
~Scribed this fifth day of Granite, 1385
_________________ ~Diana de Priondragas - Enigmatic druid, Arbiter, Counselor, Bear. ~Corinn Aldaine - Just a girl with a big heart... who can turn you into a newt. ~Vigdis Haldorsdottr - Walk softly and carry a big axe.
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